I wake up, start my daily rituals, I am pretty set with my schedule but it is a Holiday and I allow myself to wake up whenever, 7am instead of my normal 5 am. 

I feel off already, but I have some big plans. I am working on a book and some course material and sprinkled into my day, I want to put away my Halloween decor and put up my huge gingerbread display, it’s a task for sure. 

I attempt to start exercising. I’m using an app, for months I was really dedicated and then it completely fell off my schedule as I began putting all my energy into growing my business. I get interrupted by my spouse who is about to run into town and needs to know if the cauliflower I have is still good enough for dinner. I pause my workout, telling myself not to get aggravated he is being nice and offering to pick up more.

I check the refrigerator, the cauliflower, it’s squishy and growing mold. “Yes please,” he leaves and I go back to my bedroom to start my app again. Shortly after my small pomeranian pug comes in and starts biting at my socks. My 6 yr old follows closely behind and now they are engaged in a wrestling match. I hate loud noises. 

My irritation with life is boiling. Ugh, I hate this feeling and I don’t even know why I am feeling like this! This is one of my lies I tell myself. You see, I do know why I feel like this, I’m just not taking the time to sit with myself and ask. 

It is really easy to  get stuck in this place. Rather than simply taking 5 min to sit with myself and ask why I am feeling so irritated I continue to allow the irritation to BUILD. It stops me from being productive, it makes me difficult to be around, then this adds to how I am feeling because the mom/wife guilt sets in as I take out my frustration on everyone else. A cycle… like a poison flowing in my day. 

Remove myself, that is how I fix it. Remove myself, go to a quiet spot and write down why. My why is because I think that it is so “great” to spend a holiday not on schedule because that is what has been taught to me, right? Days off should have no agenda.Pat agreement creating havoc on my day. 

I pull out my journal, the one I have created in fact, and begin to write down my non-negotiable items for the day and immediately I begin to feel my energy come back, my irritation releases as get back into my happy place! 

Feeling Really Off Emotionally, Spiritually & Physically?

As we move from September into October we begin to feel ourselves spinning out of control. 6 planets are in retrograde making us feel topsy turvy!

Take the time to harness this energy instead of swimming against it. Understanding the “why” you are feeling a certain way is an instant release as your mind stops resisting what is happening.

Jupiter – watch your triggers, this is creating a feeling of being on edge and irritable. You may find yourself being more critical and less accepting of others. Be aware of your responses to others and any behind the back “slander” energy you feel drawn to participate in.

Neptune – your practical ego is conflicting with your intuitive channeling. This energy can cause you to feel paranoid about change and stop you in our tracks when it comes to emotional growth. Handle this energy by taking some extra time for yourself in grounding with things that make you feel centered. Be on the look out for others, this is an energy that brings the truth out, and those behind masks find it more difficult to hide.

Mercury – brings us into reflection with past relationships, this can bring on some intense emotions. You may feel a bit burdened by communication issues, technological bumps, and people from your past climbing out of the woodwork. Harness this energy by aligning yourself with the “now.” Focus only on what can be controlled in this moment and take some extra deep breaths when your phone or computer screen freeze up.

Pluto – the energy from Pluto allows us to self-reflect, ignoring this energy can create you self-reflecting that same energy onto others. Insecurities can fly high making you lash out. Allow yourself to explore into your shadow, this is a great time to heal, releasing what you need to refresh and align.

Saturn – the energy from Saturn gives you the ability to put forth your full heart into relationships and personal decisions. This is a time where you will know if it is right to stay where you are or to let something go that is not serving your higher divine purpose.

Uranus – this energy can bring some ups and downs financially. Use this energy to rethink your goals and dare to align with your worth. This is the time to reassess what is important. Breakthroughs can happen at this time, mindfully clear any resistance to change.

Now that you are aware of the shifting energy, you can be receptive to the ways you might be “reacting” to situations. Allow things to flow, don’t try to control and use your awareness to reflect on your actions and thoughts.

Blessed Be!

I keep repeating the phrase, over and over again, “this is not the same situation.” I don’t believe myself, it feels too real, too parallel, anxiety floods my body and my mind spins faster.

The price of hay is four times what it was last year, and no one has any for sale. The real estate market has blown up in the past 12 months, prices are creeping up on everything.

I’ve been here before. In my first marriage living in financial fear. We never had enough and were always in debt to the point that we could never climb out, deeper and deeper until the only option was to claim bankruptcy, instead my husband took his own life.

I feel smothered, I can’t breathe, is it happening again? “No!” I tell myself that this is different, the entire situation is different. I am now remarried, our careers are different, this is not the same. But, I don’t believe myself. I can’t go through this again, please, God no, I can’t.

I sit in my office chair, suddenly realizing that I need to “snap” myself out of this. I have the power, the ability to overcome this mental torture. I create an affirmation, “this is not the same,” but it does not work. It feels to close to the same and I know it. You can’t lie to yourself.

I sit, resonating with myself, fighting down the misty dark smog, I can do this. I start again, pen to paper. “Although there are similarities, this is not the same situation.” This time I believe it, because it is completely true, and I know it. I climb out of the rabbit hole just in time for my client to arrive.

That is the thing with affirmations, you can’t lie your way into something that you know isn’t true. You have to work with your subconscious to create a phrase that you can align with. Adding the simple statement of “although there are similarities,” was exactly what I needed to be able to get my mind to align with the fact that this is different and to stop expecting the worst to happen.

Our minds are beautiful things, but they can also be our worst enemy when unleashed.

Blessed Healing!

AJ

We have our minds, our entire existence wrapped around one thing, a virus. When really our focus should be on a parasite. This parasite is called, “fear” and it is causing humanity to be in a state of chaos.

Regardless of where you are in the pandemic, what your opinion or stand is on any issue, it is based off of one thing, fear. You are fearful that you will get the virus, you are fearful that wrong choices are being made, you are fearful of the vaccine, you are fearful of people who refuse to get the vaccine, you are fearful of long term effects of masks or fearful of those who refuse to wear masks.

This fear is dividing our society, causing many to drift further and further from our ultimate purpose of compassion and service. We are letting the parasite feed off of our social media posts, disrespect for each other’s opinions and the constant push of feeling “force” into believing that there is ultimately only one truth.

The more we engage in behaviors that are belittling, negative and argumentative the more we set ourselves up to attracted more confrontation and more negativity. You are what you believe, you attract how you are acting, you become a magnet for exactly what you are projecting. Living in fear, attracts more fear.

If you are living in fear, change this to acceptance. Accept that these are uncertain times and that there have been many of the same events through the history of humanity. This is the ebb and flow of life. When you accept that you have zero control over anything but your own self you start to find peace. You start to find harmony in change and realize that this is all part of the cyclic system we live in.

You do NOT have to lose yourself in the chaos. Take a step back, be thankful, find gratitude in the small things. We still live in a beautiful time, in fact there is no better time in history to live through a pandemic. Simply think of how much harder this would be without some of our modern day conveniences, technology, running water, indoor pluming, carpet the list can go on and on.

Shift your focus to what is going right, shift your focus to gratitude and peace. Let others live for themselves and you focus on acceptance and things that bring you back to your own place of feeling centered and balanced.

Blessings!

~AJ~